Video: Comparing perspectives and methods - Writing it up - Ondaatje and Bird

﻿Welcome to today's English lesson. I'm Mrs Crompton. Our focus today is to complete our work on comparing perspectives. And we will be writing up our answer. When working with two texts journey to the source of the Nile by Christopher Ondaatje and the bazaars of Baghdad, journeys in Persian and Kurdistan by Isabella bird. So before we begin, you need to make sure that you do have your planning work from our previous lesson. Other than that, you will need a pen and paper. Take a moment to make sure you've cleared any distractions away and have everything you need to hand. The quick reminders here's our question we are comparing how the writers present that different perspectives and feelings about travel In terms of criteria in the content section, the comparing attitudes section, we're looking at similarities and differences when making sure that we take into account any changes within the extract, and we are synthesising ideas, and exploring the big picture interpretations. We've picked three bits of evidence from each text. And we've made sure that we've got a mix of supporting evidence and rich quotations. And then finally, for methods, we've not only thought about the rich quotations, but we've decided to also remember to think about structural features, and also other aspects of the form and style of writing. The all culminated in our plan. So this is what you should have in front of you. Now, what we're going to do is to write up today, and the first thing we're going to do is to write up the opening, I'm going to offer you an introduction. You are then going to work through your statement, your supporting evidence *2, and your explanation in the first part of our write up, you're then going to pause, then we'll have a look at writing up about the methods. And when you're doing this, I'm just going to offer you a few sentence stems to get you started. Finally, we're going to put a conclusion on it it's not on the plan but we will make sure we think about that within the final comments and we will be doing a final pit stop and adding that on. Okay, so just so that you know what's happening next. Okay. Introduction, this is the introduction i would like to share with you and I would like you to use. Both text are autobiographical accounts detailing the experiences of two explorers, Isabella Bird in the 19th century and Christopher Ondaatje in the 21st century. Ondaatje, a successful businessman and philanthropist wants to retrace the journeys of famous explorers and travel to the source of the Nile. For him the experience is all about reliving history, whereas Isabella Bird, a Victorian female travel writer offers a pioneering voice in a world that is traditionally male, she is creating history. So in this opening, what I've tried to give you is a line of argument that's linked to this idea of the journeys and their purpose of travel, being linked to either retracing history or almost creating a piece of history. That's a link that we've just established in the opening. So that's something that you can pause, take down and use within your answer. The next thing that I'm offering you are just a few sentence starters. Okay, so in terms of writing up your response, we need to think about the what and the how. And at this stage, all I want you to do is to start to work through those opening lines of evidence, as I said, down to the part where you've gone through statement, identifying viewpoints, supporting evidence *2 and your explanation. So you're covering the first three details on your plan. Okay. Right control is over to you. Work your way through, check through your answer, then resume and we'll write the next part. Off we go. Welcome back. So now what we're going to do is to add in the rich comments about the methods. So we've got some sentence stems again, just to help you out. Write this part, think about how it links in to your previous points, and then pause again. Over to you. Welcome back. So just to finish it off, I said I wanted to do this last part. And what I would like to do is just to take that overview at the end, I gave you the introduction, and at the end, I want us to think about the fact that both on Ondaatje and Bird placed themselves in unfamiliar territory. Remember what we did at the beginning when we were synthesising ideas right at the start of the planning process, and what we're going to do is to bring everything together. And now what we're going to do with the final section is to think about the big picture interpretations, what they learn, and consequently, what we learn as readers about mankind, human nature, society, etc. So time now to think about what you want to put in this final section. And to draught that out. When you've completed that, read through the whole of your response, just to check that the flow of the ideas and maybe to tweak a few details. When you've done that, I will be waiting for you and we will look at model response together. Over to you. Welcome back. So hopefully you have now had an opportunity to complete your response to check through the flow of your writing and to make sure that you have included everything on your plan. What I'm going to do now is to offer you a model answer. And as we work through this model answer on the first reading, I would like you to take in your own response, where you have included clear points of comparison, couldn't get my words out there clear points of comparison, where you have included relevant evidence and where you have undertaken your analysis of methods. Okay. We've got the success criteria there for you to refer to later on when you review everything on your own. Here's our model answer. So this is the introduction about i shared both texts or autobiographical accounts, detailing the experiences of two explorers, Isabella Bird in the 19th century, and Christopher Ondaatje in the 21st century, Ondaatje, a successful businessman and philanthropist wants to retrace the journeys of famous explorers and travel to the source of the Nile. For him, the experience is all about reliving history, whereas Isabella Bird, a Victorian female travel writer offers a pioneering voice in a world that is traditionally male. She is creating history. So we've got that already. Let's see what happens next. Ondaatje initially emphasises the wonder he experiences as he camps by the side of Lake Victoria. Notice that I've picked out initially emphasises in some of the words where the line of argument is being developed I'm going to pick out in this bluey green colour. So initially emphasises tells the reader that there's going to be a change later on. Okay. I sat there on an inlet of a huge and beautiful expanse of water, and thought about the role this mighty Lake had played in the great explorations of the past. Not only is he mesmerised by the beauty of his surroundings, but he is also reverential in his attitudes. I've talked about attitude there if you've commented on a specific attitude that would be a take. This mighty lake has been a key location for many explorers before him. The use of the objective mighty subject terminology and purple evidence again in pink and I'm now zooming in on a method gives the lake a sense of superiority and power. Now, I've ended up commenting on method as I went along. And that is something that as you become more familiar, you will feel more comfortable doing. So if you have done that already. Amazing. That's quite an advanced skill, so well done, and it's quite natural. So that's a good thing. That's not a bad thing that we haven't done it all later. The use of the objective then mighty gives the lake a sense of superiority and palace this is a really powerful place that he's in. And I've tried to get that from the word mighty. Ondaatje considers it to be a central location in the development of mankind itself. Here Ondaatje has broadened his perspective to let the reader know that this isn't just a personal moment, but a moment that ties together history for everyone. So here I've stepped out and given a big picture interpretation. In contrast, look we've got the comparison language working. In contrast to the emotion of Ondaatje recounts Isabella Bird's description of the bazaars is far more factual. Progress through the bazaars is slow, and all the business transacted in the bazaars is a matter of bargaining. However, she does particularly note the role of women. I saw only five women tall shapeless, badly made up bundles carried mysteriously along rather by high loose canary yellow leather boots and by feet. As she uses the asyndetic list, there's my subject terminology and I'm zooming in to put in my method, as she uses the asyndetic list to describe the five women she saw initially. That is an effect of objectifying them as they just become badly made up bundles. That idea of the objectification of individuals who weren't travelling, who weren't being written about by Victorian travel writers. I've tried to incorporate that idea from one of our previous lessons this session. So I've included that there is an effect of objectifying them as they just become badly made up bundles. However, her fascination is hinted at by the use of the adverb mysteriously. And then her zooming in, Now I'm doing method with zooming in, but I'm looking at a structural feature and that's fine. And then her zooming in on the canary yellow leather boots, which is a vibrant detail that seems to take Bird by surprise. This is echoed in her description of the intricate tattoos of the ladies, Isabella Bird as a female herself cannot help but compare his situation to the women of Baghdad by doing so Bird to has an emotional response, but to the community rather than the landscape. So here in terms of her travelling, her emotion comes from finding a point of interest when she's looking at the woman and thinking about them in relation to herself. Haven't finished with this point. So I'm going to carry on with a little bit of analysis. Bird's use the primary colours. Canary yellow is similar to Ondaatje account when he describes the brilliantly coloured clothing, red, violet, indigo, blue, green, yellow and orange. Now, I'm actually comparing method here across the two texts. That's an interesting way of going about it perfectly legitimate, and you can do that and it just happens to be that the two details made me think of a point of comparison sign included in here to show you that we can do that we can think about how the writers communicate that fascination with where they've travelled to by what they notice and how they describe it. Listing is also similarly used to communicate to the reader. The overwhelming difference between both writers experience they both very much see themselves as observers looking in the bold colours they use in their descriptions suggest a sense of childlike awe and wonder. So what happens when they get really excited both of them is that they become like children. And that is the excitement of travel, isn't it by going somewhere new, you see things and you have all these new experiences just as you did when you were a child. Ondaatje, and Bird both place themselves in unfamiliar territory. However, despite their initial difference in that context, and purpose for travel, they both seem to come to a very similar reflection and understanding from their visits at the end. Ondaatje reflects on how the River Nile and its power will always take precedence of mankind as he watches the teeming masses of people. Similarly, as Bird ends her peace, she has moved from the bazaars through the streets of Baghdad and ends with a final image of the grandeur of the desert sands. She uses an image of the wall to symbolise the conflict of man versus nature. Nature produces magnificence whereas decay and meanness is created by the teeming masses of mankind. So now I've moved into more of a method for cost analysis, which started with the canary yellow and moved through. Okay. Let's go back to the beginning and hand that over to you. My final comment there was about the power of nature and how both of the characters Ondaatje and Bird ended up realising that nature has more beauty and integrity than the manmade constructions around it. It's now opportunity for you to work through this model, response, review, refine, revise your own work text sections, think about some of the ideas that are a little bit more challenging. I have put in more complex ideas for you to consider. And it's important that we keep pushing and pushing and pushing our interpretations. Work your way through Paul's refine. And I'll be waiting for you just to go through the final reflection. And there we have it. That's possibly the most complex skill that you have to do in English synthesise across two texts, compare ideas, compare methods, think about perspectives. There's a lot in that answer, but you have just achieved it so well done on that achievement. Thank you for your focus today. Please don't forget to do the exit quiz. Enjoy the rest of your learning. Thank you very much.

Exit Quiz: Comparing perspectives and methods - Writing it up - Ondaatje and Bird

Completed: Comparing perspectives and methods - Writing it up - Ondaatje and Bird

In this lesson, we will complete our learning on comparing writers’ perspectives and methods by using our plan to write up a final response.  We will use a writing frame to help organise our ideas and support our writing.  You will then be able to assess your response by comparing it to a model answer.   As usual, there will be a final quiz to recap on our learning. 


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Comparing perspectives and methods - Writing it up - Ondaatje and Bird

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